I am not a mother-but was trained as a school teacher, babysat thousands of hours, and am the proud Aunt of five nephews and nieces under the age of 5. I feel experienced to comment on adult bullies though-especially with 15 years of work experience.
We spend a lot of time and energy talking about and addressing bullying with children.
We should-but has anyone stopped to think: These bully kids grow up-they now have more money, bigger egos, better clothes (in some instances), and more power. They are still the mean kids. What makes this even more difficult, is we have “less tools” to deal with them in the workplace because we were supposed to grow up, treat each other with respect and “know better”. Some have made the transition-some have not.
For those “stuck” at work with a bully boss or co-worker, here are some practical tips to help you.
1.) Document everything for your own records (even if you just email the notes to yourself)
2.) Make your own network at work-develop your own friendships and support system
3.) Ask the “bully” for a brief (just the both of you) conversation. Prepare in advance. Have the meeting outside of the office (grounds, cafe, take a walk-use a common area where you can talk privately-but feel safe)
3.) Contact HR and your Manager if the bullying behavior continues (behavior exhibited, conversations, course of action, next steps)
Remember-they are still that little kid,-just in better clothes. If you stand up for yourself (in a professional manner), you are way less interesting to push around.
If you would like to receive a free resource on how to initiate difficult conversations, please contact me at [email protected]
